Why You Should Consider Adopting a Shy Cat

Reserved and observant, shy cats take a little longer to warm up. But with understanding and the right approach, you can help your shy feline friend feel more secure. In this guide we’ll explore the reasons behind shyness in cats and teach you how to create a comfortable environment for them — including the steps you can take to help them gain confidence. Whether you’re a seasoned pet parent or considering adopting your first pet, a shy cat can be a great addition to the family. 

We’ll go over everything from how to get a shy cat to stop hiding to anti-anxiety meds for cats. With patience, love, and a few creative strategies, your new feline friend will feel right at home. 

Understanding shyness in cats 

Shyness in cats can manifest as hiding, avoiding eye contact, and being generally skittish around people. Understanding the root causes of shy behaviors is the first step toward helping your cat feel more comfortable and confident. First, let’s explore some answers to help you understand why your cat is so shy.

• Environmental changes: Moving to a new home, introducing new pets (or people), and other significant changes can cause cats to retreat to a safe place. Cats thrive on routine, so it’s important to help them adjust to changes by maintaining consistency where you can. 

• Lack of socialization: Cats not exposed to diverse environments, humans, or other animals at a young age are more likely to be shy, especially around strangers. The period between two and seven weeks is crucial for developing social skills, and cats who miss those opportunities may need a little extra help. (These cats may also need to learn behaviors like not scratching furniture and how to use a litter box.) 

• Genetics: Some cats are naturally more timid due to their breed and genes. Additionally, male cats and female cats may exhibit different traits. Understanding cat breed behaviors and individual personalities will help you choose the right feline for your family.

• Trauma: Anxiety in cats is more common in those who have experienced abuse, neglect, or other traumatic events. These negative experiences can require a lot of time to overcome, so be patient with your new family member while they learn to trust you. 

• Health issues: Pain, illness, and medical conditions can make a cat more withdrawn. Check-in with your vet to rule out any underlying health concerns that could contribute to shyness. 

How to help a shy cat

Once you understand why your cat (or potential cat) is exhibiting shyness, you’re ready to learn how to help a shy cat adjust to a new home. This process requires patience, but with the right strategies and a lot of love, there are several tactics you can employ to support your feline family member. 

Create a safe and comfortable environment

• Designate a quiet space: Provide a quiet room or area in your home where your cat can retreat and feel safe. Shy or scared cats tend to hide, so this space should have cozy hiding spots such as covered beds or boxes where your cat can relax and unwind. 

• Stock up on supplies: Make sure your cat has easy access to food, water, and a litter box in their safe space. Reducing the need for them to leave their safe area can help them build confidence before venturing out. 

Respect your cat’s boundaries

• Let them come to you: Wondering how to get a shy cat to like you? It may take some patience, but let your cat approach you on their own terms. Avoid forcing interactions or picking them up if they seem uncomfortable. An exception to this rule is when socializing or fostering a very young kitten. It’s often helpful to carry the kitten in a hoodie pocket or keep them near you to help them adjust to your presence. 

• Observe and adapt: Pay attention to your cat’s body language and cues. If they seem stressed or scared, or like they’re shutting down, give them space and try again later. 

Use positive reinforcement 

• Treats and praise: Use treats and gentle verbal praise to reward your cat for positive social behaviors, like coming out of hiding or approaching you for nuzzles. 

• Interactive play: The best toys for shy cats encourage interaction. Play in a way that stimulates your cat, using toys such as feather wands or laser pointers. Having fun is a great way to build trust and confidence. Provide a variety of toys to keep things interesting, and rotate them frequently to prevent boredom. 

Medication can help

• Veterinary consultation: Your cat or kitten’s first vet visit is a great time to get an extra opinion on what you can do to help them. If your cat’s shyness and anxiety are severe, consult your vet to learn about anti-anxiety medications. These may reduce stress and help your cat adjust to their new environment. 

• Calming aids: If prescriptions aren’t right for your pet, there are plenty of other options. Try sprays or diffusers with feline pheromones to help anxiety, or calming chews from a local pet supply store. 

Adopting a shy cat

Adopting a shy cat comes with challenges and rewards. Patience is required, because building trust takes time. But the deep bond that will form makes it worth the wait (and occasional frustration). Your cat’s unique personality and affection will come through over time, as you become closer companions. If you’re ready to take the leap and bring home a shy, loving cat, here’s one final checklist to help you cat-proof your house and make it feel welcoming to your new friend.

If you need a little extra help getting your kitty to adjust, read the book Total Cat Mojo, check out our guides (on cat aggression, anxiety, trust issues, and body language), or consult a veterinary behaviorist. These sources can provide a lot of assistance and comfort throughout the homing process. If you’re unsure about adoption, you can also try fostering cats through your local shelter to get a better idea of how to interact with shy cats and kittens. 

Adoption preparation checklist

• Create a quiet space: Set up a safe area with hiding spots, food, water, and a litter box. (Be aware that shy cats may need a little help to start using the litterbox.) 

• Gather supplies: Ensure you have all necessary items, including food, toys, bedding, and a scratching post.

• Establish a routine: Plan a consistent schedule for feeding, playtime, and quiet periods.

• Gradual introductions: Introduce your cat slowly to new family members and other pets. Sometimes different steps are recommended for introducing kittens. 

• Consult a veterinarian: Schedule an initial health check and discuss any potential anxiety treatments.

Commonly asked questions 

What should I ask a shelter when adopting a cat?

When adopting a cat, it’s important to ask the shelter about the cat’s health history, temperament, and previous experiences with humans and other animals. Inquire about any specific needs or behavioral issues the cat may have, as well as their compatibility with other pets or children. Cat anxiety symptoms may resolve over time in a comfortable and safe environment. 

Why is my new cat hiding? 

New surroundings can be overwhelming for most cats, especially for shy ones. Your new cat is likely hiding because they feel insecure and are trying to adjust to this unfamiliar environment. Providing a quiet, safe space where your cat can retreat and gradually explore at their own pace can help them feel more secure. 

How can I calm down an anxious cat?

To calm down an anxious cat, try using pheromone sprays or diffusers, providing hiding spots, and creating a quiet environment. Engaging in gentle play and using positive reinforcement can also help reduce anxiety. If your cat’s anxiety is severe, consult a veterinarian about potential treatments or medications. 

Can a shy cat become a lap cat? 

A shy cat can absolutely become a lap cat! Just remember, not all cats enjoy physical affection, even those who aren’t shy. Always let a cat come to you on their own terms. 

References

Bashful Buddies

Breed Differences of Heritable Behaviour Traits in Cats

Building a Trusting Relationship with Fearful Cats

Cat Coat Color, Personality Traits, and the Cat-Owner Relationship Scale